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11 October 2007 @ 09:12 am
How did you meet your LJ friends?  
Most of you will know by now that I'm working on my master thesis at the the moment. The working title (which changes frequently *g*) is "The emergence of hybrid relations through computer mediated communication". Long story short, it's about relationships and friendships that form through online communication. That's where I need your help and expertise! I'm stuck on a chapter and I need a little inspiration and because you are all experts on this topic I could really need your help. I would appreciate if you could answer a question for me and maybe tell me some of your experiences. Please???

HOW DID YOU MEET YOUR ONLINE FRIENDS? Did you meet them in fandom? Was it pure coincidence? Did you read someones user info and friended the person because of your shared interest?Did you know any of your online friends prior to your online interaction? Have you met some of your online friends in real life?D

Thanks in advance ♥
Current Mood: hopefulhopeful
Anjacologne_chick on October 11th, 2007 07:39 am (UTC)
Okay, let's see...

Most of my friends I met via fandom, mayby they posted interesting stuff on communities, or they were friend's friends, they friended me first and I checked their userinfo - if it sounded interesting I friended back, or I met them via friending memes.

Some other friends I met an events like conventions and friended them after the event.

A few of my friends I have known in RL before and then they started a LJ too.

Does this help??? Or do you need to know more?
Michaela: Jsquaredmichaela3105 on October 11th, 2007 07:57 am (UTC)
Thank you so much!

It's really interesting that shared interests and fandom in particular seem to be the origin of many online relationships. Friending memes are definitely something I sould look into for my thesis either. Thanks again. Your input will help a lot with the online questionnaire I'm planning. I really appreciate you taking the time!
Tori Lovelostandalone22 on October 11th, 2007 07:53 am (UTC)
I've met the bulk of my friends through those friending meme things, but also, it seems like every time I post something to a comm, someone friends me, so I always friend them back. I only know two of my online friends through real life. One of Christina's friends and Christina are both on LJ.

Over on MySpace, though, my whole friends box is either my friends (from RL), Christina's friends, or friends I had in high school.
Michaela: Sam and Deanmichaela3105 on October 11th, 2007 08:33 am (UTC)
Thank you! I think it's really interesting that online relationships can have their origins either in real life or in online communication.
tinkabell007: j2 love intensetinkabell007 on October 11th, 2007 08:29 am (UTC)
are we talking just LJ friends? Otherwise I'd have two other examples about online friendship for you.

Oh and I love the couch header :D
Michaela: Impalamichaela3105 on October 11th, 2007 08:32 am (UTC)
Other online relationships are fine as well. Thanks for helping me out *hugs*
tinkabell007: spn sam hottinkabell007 on October 11th, 2007 12:28 pm (UTC)
Okay... ich hab damals meine beste Freundin über das Internet kennen gelernt. Wir waren beide am selben Forum und hatte eigentlich nie etwas miteinandern zu tun, haben nur immer wieder im selben thread gepostet. Irgendwann ergab sich mal ein Gespräch, dass dann später per pn weitergeführt wurde. Haben dann Instant Messanger Nummern ausgetauscht. Ja und mit der Zeit wurde es halt immer intensiver und man hat sich immer mehr erzählt. Irgendwann hab ich dann festgestellt, dass sie zu einer Person geworden ist, die wirklich am meisten über mich weiß, mich am besten kennt und wir uns oft schon ohne große Worte verstanden haben. Und da ich "beste Freunde" nicht damit definier wie oft wir rumhängen oder fortgehen, sondern inwiefern man mit der Person reden kann und sie für einen da ist, ist sie zu einer meiner besten Freundinnen geworden. Wir hatten uns bis dato immer noch nicht getroffen. (Das kam erst 4 (!!) Jahre später) Daher glaub ich auch, dass, wenn man die richtigen Leuten über das Internet kennenlernt, diese Freundschaft genauso echt und real sein kann, als irgendwer aus der Nachbarschaft.

Eine 2. gute Freundin, die ich mittlerweile 12 Jahre kenne, hab ich auch erstmalig über eine "Suche/Tausche/Verkaufe" Seite übers Net kennengelernt. Sie und ich waren/sind Fans von der gleichen Band und hatten anfangs Kontakt, da wir Fotos ausgetauscht haben. Danach haben wir Emails geschrieben und später auch in ICQ gechattet. Getroffen haben wir uns ebenfalls erst einige Jahre danach, als wir gemeinsam auf ein Konzert gegangen sind.

Ansonsten hab ich noch einige Leute übers Internet die ich sehrwohl als echte Freunde bezeichne. Nur weil zwei Computer und ne Telefonleitung dazwischen sind, heißt es noch lange nicht, dass man minderwertige Gespräche mit der anderen Person führt. :)

[vanessa] call me miss shameless.vanee on October 11th, 2007 09:31 am (UTC)
Great subject! Okay, as for me, I’ve been using the Internet for more than 12 years now. I even met one of my best “real-life” friends over the Internet. We used to be fans of a band and one day I got an e-mail from her offering some photos of that band. She had found my e-mail address via a forum of that band. Anyway, we exchanged e-mails and told each other about our lives, and it turned out we were living in the same city. So then we exchanged phone numbers and then met up, and what can I say, we became really good friends and have been ever since.

I also am a member of an Auction Site for Teens & Twens (LaundroMatic) and it has an integrated community. I have met so many lovely people via this Community, and they have become real friends. I have met up with some of them in other countries, for example, I met one of my friends from Boston/MA when she was studying in Amsterdam and I went to meet up with her. I am also meeting up with a bunch of the European Members from that Community next year to celebrate one of the girls’ birthday together in London or Oslo.
Finally, for my LJ friends, it really depends. Some of them I have “met” via other messageboards and we exchanged LJ Names, some I have met through fandom-related communities and friending-memes, some I knew in RL before adding them on LJ (for example, I met a bunch of them at Asylum this year) and some of them found me through random LJ-browsing and vice versa. If I get along well with them, I definitely try to meet up (which is definitely the case for the majority of my LJ friends). With some, we meet on a semi-regular basis just for dinner, or for the movies etc., because we live relatively close to each other’s homes; this is the case for cologne_chick, ongiara, and legoline.
So as you can see, to me, online friends are pretty much “real” friends and I try to keep in touch with them and build up a relationship outside of the Internet. Since I don’t have a “Secret” online persona, i.e. I am the way I am and not behaving differently online, I don’t see any problems in meeting up with others. Maybe I am even more open online than I am in RL sometimes, even if I do know the online friends I confide in personally.
So, in conclusion, yay for online friends!
Michaela: DickCassidymichaela3105 on October 11th, 2007 10:53 am (UTC)
Thank you so much for your detailed explanation. You brought up some very interesting points like "online friends are real friends" because in theory online relationships are supposed to be weak ties. Thanks again, I really appreciate it *hugs*

yay for online friends!
I couldn't agree more!!!
zenamydogzenamydog on October 11th, 2007 12:29 pm (UTC)
How??? Hmmmm, now let me see?

Go to Vancouver in March 08?? LOL

Sorry hon, I just couldn't resist.

Your eyes are blocking my starlightaerynvala on October 11th, 2007 12:41 pm (UTC)
My closest friends I knew prior to us all hanging out on LJ. In fact, I dragged them all over to LJ. :D

I met all of them on fandom specific email lists. I'm thinking here of the four closest friends I have. But all of my online friends I've met through fandom except for two, and those I met on spirituality specific message boards.

I've gotten close to new people via LJ and via fan conventions and through friends.

I've met several of my online friends in real life thanks to the fan conventions I attend. I've only got one friend that I made entirely off-line. And even there, we met because we were both in the same web design class. Pretty much my world revolves around internet interactions.

Good luck!
Nathreeenathreee on October 11th, 2007 02:11 pm (UTC)
I thought you'd like to know my point of view. I play a lot of massively multiplayer online roleplaying games. These games are designed to be played together, so it's inevitable that I meet a lot people there. People form groups who hang out and play together and with about 3 hours of play time per day, we get to know each other pretty well. But I feel something is lacking from relationships formed like that. I cannot get attached to someone unless I've actually met them. I don't feel like I really know them until I've met them in Real Life. And thus no matter how much I like the people I play with, I find it easy to leave the group and start a different game if I've never met any of them; they seem to be only names to me, even if I know a lot about them and have chatted with them frequently.

I have met most of my LJ friends in Real Life and that makes the relationship different. Existing acquantances can become much deeper friendships once you start reading each other's LJs. One of my best friends now used to be just an acquaintance before he started reading my LJ. Because blog are frequently used as a way to express oneself frankly, it contributes much to a relationship, but in my opinion, there can be no relationship without real personal contact once in a while.
j: grinoxlahun on October 11th, 2007 03:50 pm (UTC)
I've been meeting friends online since january 1992, before the web really existed (except in a couple of isolated pockets). The modern phenomenon of social networking sites (LJ, MySpace, Facebook, &c.) is neither the beginning nor the end of this trend.

Yes, in 15 (nearly 16) years, I've met many of them in person, and drawn many offline friends into online communities. Some go, some stay. You know, like everything else that happens with friends.

I have a couple people in my LJ friends list I picked up based on interests (at least one from responding to a random post when I was bored one day), but most of them are through mutual association with someone else.
ファビュラス マックスjai_dit on October 11th, 2007 08:15 pm (UTC)
Somewhere between a third and half are from high school (through which I also got an invite code, back when you needed one to start an LJ). Around the same percentage are from meeting people through volunteering for LiveJournal. The rest are people I know from other places on the internet, mostly.

And I've met a good number of online friends in real life.